When deploring behaviour ...

... it's always a good idea to ask what part of it is normal
This is further to this earlier post about sexting.

Thinking about it, got me thinking about a woman in the neighbourhood. Sometimes, when I'm out, perhaps walking the dog, she will come over and we'll chat about something. And sometimes, she'll notice a weed and she'll bend over and pull it out. And sometimes, because she is only just outside her door and not going shopping or going to work or something, she will not be wearing a bra when she bends over to pull up that weed.

All of this could be unplanned on her part but things like that have happened often enough now that I know it isn't. She has noticed that I'm the kind who will steal a glance when the opportunity presents itself and I know that she is the kind who will give a glance when the opportunity presents itself. And I've noticed that she is very careful to only do this when there is no third party anywhere to notice what she is doing. It's not a prelude to any sort of sex. It is an end in itself.

I like to think that I have a finely attuned sense of what is an acceptable glance and she no doubt thinks she has a finely attuned sense of giving a glance without being too exhibitionistic about it. For all I know, others might conclude that we both are ridiculous.

What you cannot conclude is that either of us are doing anything that isn't normal.

Our culture is just full of traditions and acceptable behaviours that allow women to flash it about a bit. Not all women nor all men want this but the majority do and the culture accommodates that. And it is not surprising, nor should it be alarming, that girls, especially young girls, are willing to push the boundaries a bit. Sexting nude or semi-nude pictures is not some bizarre behaviour never seen before but only the latest twist on something men and women have been doing for centuries.

What is novel is the risk this carries. The young woman who pulls her shirt down and takes a shot of her breasts and sends them to a guy probably feels no different than when she bends over to pick something out of her purse on the floor at the restaurant (and perhaps she is not entirely unaware that the guy next tables over is getting the same view her dinner companion is). The difference is that it isn't as temporary an exposure as it feels and it will take women a little while to figure this out. The ones that want to figure it out that is.