From now on, I'll be Socrates

A friend of mine encouraged all her Facebook friends to do one of those dumb Buzzfeed quizzes. This one was to determine which philosopher you are.

Okay, waste of time.

But it turned out to be useful in an unexpected way. I answered the questions by picking the options I thought a good person would (meaning the person I thought I should want to be) the first time through and got told I was most like Kant. Words cannot say how little I want to be like Kant. So I did it again and decided to answer the questions as I would if I didn't care about anyone or anything. My answers are below. They are provided without context because the context in this case is meaningless (but if you must know, click here and do the quiz for yourself first).

1. I decided chastity was the most over-rated virtue because getting rid of it would be very convenient. 
2. I picked Bree Van Der Kamp as desperate housewife because her facial expression in the photograph the quiz provides makes me want to hate her so I figured she deserved to be desperate. 
3. I picked “vegetarians are annoying to be around” because they are. 
4. I picked mayonnaise as my favourite condiment as a way of doubling down on those irritating scolds who tell me what I should or shouldn’t eat. 
5. I picked "I’m never bad" because I don’t [suppressed gerund] care what you think of me. 
6. I picked Gossip Girl because I wish more women were like Serena and I damn well don’t care if that makes anyone feel threatened. 
7. I picked cooking for Saturday activity because it’s true. 
8. I picked Barcelona because I thought the girls there looked hotter than any other European city. 
9. I chose to make an excuse to not see my grandmother. 
10. And I picked “feeling cheeky” for reasons that shouldn’t need any explaining. 

And for that, the quiz tells me that I am most like Socrates. It says,

If you don’t understand something, you’re not afraid to ask questions about it. You try your hardest to be a moral person and don’t value material possessions very highly.

And it got me thinking, why not approach all life's challenges like this? If it has so little effect on the results, why not just do the things and express the opinions I would if I didn't care what anyone thought of me? You know, I think I've just decided what to give up for Lent.

I kid you not.

Moral philosophy quiz answers (11)

Last one.

 11. ASCETIC LIFE Is ascetic living (simple life with a minimum of physical comforts) conducive to being virtuous?
    a) Yes, it is essential to live this way
    b) Pretty much, but it isn't particularly essential to live this way
   c) No, physical comforts are fine, they may even be rewarding
   d) Doesn't matter/Dislike all answer choices
      What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

Asceticism is a very powerful idea that people love to take up telling themselves it is the opposite of selfishness when it is usually driven by very selfish motives. Think of all these people detoxing themselves for example. South Park is very good at tackling this sort of vanity.

An ascetic life is only a simulacrum of morality.

Moral philosophy quiz answers (10)

10. LIBERTY Would it be ideal to maximize pleasure for all people even at the cost of liberty for some?
    a) Yes
    b) No, we need liberty
   c) No, maximization of pleasure for all people has nothing to do with morality.
   d) Doesn't matter/Dislike all answer choices
      What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

This is utilitarianism again.  It's a hot political issue right now but I won't go into that other than to say that utilitarianism is a bankrupt position and so is any politics derived from it. 

The people who push utilitarian ideas aren't evil but they are wrong and their policies will fail, although it can take an awful long time and do a lot of hurt before they do.

Moral philosophy quiz answers (9)

9. INDIVIDUAL & OTHERS Is the self-pleasure or self-preservation of the individual ever in conflict with the same type of interests of others?
    a) No, and virtuous living is consistently beneficial to the individual and the community.
    b) Yes, and it is wrong to be selfish, one should lean towards benevolence.
   c) Yes, and neither the interest of own self nor the interest of the other is more important.
    d) Yes, and acting in one's own self-interest is fine.
    e) Yes, and acting in one's own self-interest is morally essential.
    f) Doesn't matter/Dislike all answer choices
      What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

The words "selfish" and "lean towards" are vitally important here. I can think of lots of situations where one should act in self interest. If the jurisdiction you live in is spending itself into oblivion and you think financial collapse is coming you should by all means move out now if you can (That means you if you live in Illinois or California; get out while the getting is good). It's not selfish to refuse to go along with the apparently suicidal wishes of the public and its government.

Moral philosophy quiz answers (8)

 8. END, MEANS, INTENT Which is the most important, morally?
    a) The intent (the choice to do something or the will).
    b) The means (the way something is done).
    c) The ends (the results from the action).
   d) None of them are significantly more important than the others.
    e) Doesn't matter/Dislike all answer choices
      What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low 

 Not much explanation needed here. The crucial thing is that I think moral virtue means the capacity to deliver*. The person who always means well but can't come across isn't quite morally useless but they will be if they don't change soon.


*Incidentally,  one of the most significant shifts in moral philosophy to come with the Enlightenment was the shift away from results to intent. You can see it in what are probably the two most famous lines ever written about moral goods:

“It is impossible to think of anything at all in the world, or indeed even beyond it, that could be considered good without limitation except a good will.” Immanuel Kant

“Every art and every inquiry, and similarly every action and pursuit, is thought to aim at some good and for this reason the good has rightly been declared to be that at which all things aim.” Aristotle

And there you have about as important contrast as you will find in moral thinking. Lots of people didn't like Kant's answer but virtually all moral philosophy since Kant has taken his side on this. One very notable exception is Nietzsche who does good work shredding the Enlightenment view. (Interestingly enough, Nietzsche does this in an attempt to save the day for Enlightenment ideals.

Moral philosophy quiz answers (6)

Ah yes, happiness.

 6. HAPPINESS Will using morality properly necessarily result in maximization of our own happiness?
    a) Yes.
   b) No, not necessarily.
   c) Doesn't matter/Dislike all answer choices
      What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low  

 I like the word happiness. Any morality worth it's salt will be aimed at happiness. 

I'm not so fond of the word maximization. That says utilitarianism and being older than twenty-five and believing in utilitarianism is like being over twenty-five and reading comic books, It says that you are not a serious person. So I fudged the answer. Happiness yes. Maximization of happiness no.

 

Moral philosophy quiz answers (5 and 12)

I'm going to group two together here because I think the balance between passion and reason is crucial. To my way of thinking, no one without strong passions is capable of being virtuous. So here are questions numbers five and twelve:

 5. VIRTUOUS LIFE To be virtuous/live morally, we should primarily make moral distinctions according to:
    a) our passions, desires, and sentiment.
    b) our reasoning that is used to achieve our will.
   c) our inherent knowledge (what we know without experimentation).
    d) our empirical knowledge (what we know with experimentation).
    e) our intellect in general, but not to achieve desires.
    f) religious revelation and spiritual reflection.
    g) Doesn't matter/Dislike all answer choices
      What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low  

12. VIRTUOUS PERSON A virtuous person can be described best as:
   a) Strong, powerful and passionate
   b) Strong, powerful and rational
    c) Humble, restrained and spiritual
    d) Humble, restrained and rational
    e) Caring and loving
    f) Concerned with others, yet very rational
    g) Doesn't matter/Dislike all answer choices
      What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low  

 There is no contradiction here. We make moral distinctions rationally but they have to be driven by our passions. Not our "natural" passions but the passions that we have cultivated in ourselves. The right passions are a lot like oysters, they are an acquired taste.

 

Moral philosophy quiz answers (4)

Okay, I surprised myself with this one:

4. SOCIETAL INFLUENCE Must a person be coerced/ influenced at some level by societal powers in order to live morally/virtuously?
    a) Yes, people will be good only when ruling forces of society use the power of force to make them be as such.
    b) Yes, people will try to be good when they have knowledge of the virtuous life, but societal guidance and reinforcement (sometimes forceful) is necessary.
   c) Sort of, society doesn't have to coerce a person to find morality, but the interest/rights of others in society must conveyed to a person in order for that person to determine right from wrong.
    d) No, society should be not be an influence on a person when one is trying to find virtue.
    e) No, society must be physically abandoned in all its forms in order to find virtue.
    f) Doesn't matter/Dislike all answer choices
      What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low  

If someone had confronted me  with this answer in isolation I might well have disagreed with it. If they had asked me any time before my thirtieth birthday, I would have disagreed. But, again, my life experience tells me that we have to be taught virtue. And we have to be taught in an authoritative manner.

Moral philosophy quiz answers (3)

3. PROPER ORIGIN OF MORALITY Where does the proper distinction between "good" and "bad" come from?
    a) A moral realm that is completely unique, transcendent.
    b) Every individual, through their choice to pursue that which they desire.
    c) God's will
   d) From holistic forces of the universe (may involve divine power or not).
    e) Human nature, with the natural interests of people
    f) Human intellect, with the natural capabilities of human thought
    g) Doesn't matter/Dislike all answer choices
      What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

Here I will lose a lot of people and if I had been asked this question in my early twenties I would have picked "a".

Why have I changed? Because I don't think any of the other answers work. I've tried them all and they all lead to the same dead end. Nothing in nature or science could provide the foundation of an ethics that could be a real ethics. It would just be pragmatism under a another name. 

  

Moral philosophy quiz answers (2)

 2. PURPOSE TO LIFE Does each person have a moral purpose/morally ideal way to live?
    a) Yes, the ideal life exists outside of one's preferences and is the same for all people
    b) Yes, but the way to live in order to meet that purpose is unique for each individual
   c) Yes, but following moral law is the only standard that a person must meet
    d) No, yet there are ways to act that are inherently more conducive to the self-interest of the person who is acting
    e) No, yet there are logically consistent ways to act and logically inconsistent ways to act
    f) Doesn't matter/Dislike all answer choices
      What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low  

My choice is in white. Again, nothing about my answer here took any soul searching. I believe in virtue ethics because I believe we have a purpose. This is what I was taught  by my parents at home and the Nuns at school from an early age and I agree. A half century life experience has only led me to agree more strongly.

Moral philosophy quiz answers (1)

I mentioned a while ago that I did a moral philosophy selector quiz available on line and found, to my surprise, that I lined up with Aquinas. That was a surprise because I started rebelling against Aquinas a Catholic school boy in Grade 8 and thought I'd spent my whole life repudiating the man.

So what were my answers. Well, I'm going to blog them all with explanations. Here is question 1 (my answers are in white:

1. MORAL STATEMENTS Moral statements are primarily:
   a) statements of fact or truth (e.g. "Murder is wrong" means "It is a fact that murder is wrong").
   b) statements of the speaker's desire/emotion?(e.g. "Murder is wrong" means "I hate murder").
    c) statements of command (e.g. "Murder is wrong" means "I say: don't murder").
    d) Doesn't matter/Dislike all answer choices

      What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low  

This question determines that I am some variety of moral realist. A moral realist believes there is some standard of truth outside of us that applies in morality. The significant alternative here is emotivism, which is what you are if you picked #2. If you have been to college, you were probably subjected to some considerable amount of influence to become an emotivist.

As Raymond Chandler  once said, emotivism is a fine position if you are in a polite society where people tend to want the right things anyway. I've dealt with the huge problems of emotivism here.

I was not surprised to find myself answering as I did here. I have been a moral realist all my life. I remember getting into a  debate with a beautiful girl in Grade 11 and very strongly defending the position.